In loving memory of Dad Pham
On Sunday, we attended temple for Day 49 since Dad's passing. I can't believe he's been gone that long already. Here is my tribute to Dad's life.
Touched is too soft a word. No, Dad Pham influenced so many people's lives during his 79 years.
We have family in Germany and Australia who wouldn't have the lives they've built if Dad hadn't helped them evacuate when the Viet Cong invaded, or driven a refugee boat out of Vietnam, then spent nearly all his income to help family members.
It's no wonder, even though we had planned a small funeral service and told only relatives and a few close family friends, double the people we anticipated attended Dad's funeral service. The funeral home had to put out seating in their back room. My Uncle said he'd told people it was a private family affair, otherwise there would have been even more mourners.
I wrote a series on Dad Pham's life from Vietnam to Germany to Australia. But I never wrote about him as a person.
Dad was super intelligent and able to process vast amounts of new knowledge quickly, it's how he adapted to multiple new countries so well. He had a wicked sense of humour and impossibly quick wit. He was a wise old soul and spoke very eloquently; people listened when he had something to say. Though, he'd always say many people listen but few understand.
Above all else, he loved my Mum. He loved her so intensely sometimes I think he loved his children because we're a piece of her.
When I observe my siblings, I see Mum Pham is our kindness, Dad Pham is our sharpness, and both parents gifted us with generosity. Mum gave by serving (nurturing, feeding, listening to others), Dad gave by sharing (knowledge, advice, opening our home). There's a selflessness about my Phamly that I'm proud of and want to pass on to the next generation. The world could do with more Mum Phams and Dad Phams, especially now they're both gone.
Rest in peace beside Mum Pham, Dad. We love you.
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