Dreaming of Mum Pham

August 20, 2018


I have been a bit emotional and teary this past fortnight. It is mostly hormones - the rational side of me knows this, but the irrational side of me feels or wants it to be something more because for the first time in two years I'm dreaming regularly of Mum Pham again. Every few nights she has been in my dreams and it's the best until I wake up and lose her all over again when I remember she is gone.

The dreams are always different but have one common theme - Mum is coming to visit. The first night she came to visit me in my new place and was sitting at the end of my bed and we spoke without speaking so even in the dream I knew it was a dream yet it felt real. She wasn't as old as she was when she passed - her face was smoother but she was in her favourite knit vest and dress. She was patting my legs under the doona and comforting me, telling me everything would be well.

The next dream she was coming to visit me at work with Dad Pham and they got lost on the trains, and I had to go looking for them. I had to wade through a crowd of people exiting the train station and I finally spotted them and started approaching. Dad was looking around for me but Mum saw me first - she pulled at Dad's arm to point me out and when she and I locked eyes and smiled, I woke up.

The best dream was hanging out in an almalgamation of Mum & Dad's Brisbane house and our Aunty's house in Melbourne. It was my favourite Mum dream because we were cooking and talking and eating and talking and just doing what we normally did together when she was still alive. I woke up from this dream feeling like she was still here.

Mum Pham passed on the 18/7 in the lunar calendar, which is 28/8 in this calendar year. I will burn incense for her with The Phamly and send up my prayers. I love and miss you, Mum. Always.

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