So I left my dream job and my beloved CK Phamly. Surprise! It was a sad decision but sometimes you gotta do what you need, not what you want.
I have mostly fond memories of growing up in the now demolished council flats in Kensington, Melbourne. Except for two violent ball related memories. One was getting a painful leg and ass-whooping from Mum Pham and her feather duster for having a $2 black and blue soccer ball stolen from the playground while we climbed on rocks.
I always thought I'd buy a boyfriend on eBay one day but I ended up getting one for free off Tinder. Bargain! You have to trawl through a lot more crap on Tinder but it's amazing what people will do for free things. I never thought I'd end up getting serious with a devout Christian. And I definitely never thought I'd go to church with him to see how the other side lives. Especially not after waking at 2am for the World Cup. I was scared I'd fall asleep and embarrass him by snoring or farting.
Smile! Those teeth don't clean themselves.
I was traumatised by a dentist in the public service when I was little. She was rough and mean, and must have thought I was being a wimp like other patients but no, I had a tiny mouth and I was whimpering because she'd ripped the left side of my lips open. After that day, I refused to go back to the dentist until I had money to pay for a good one (we were poor so free was the only option). It wasn't until a decade later when I had my first full-time job that I went to a posh dentist in Melbourne for a check-up. Luckily I didn't need much work apart from replacing a filling and good old clean.
I'm going through a phase of reading instructions and manuals lately. It turns out I've been doing a lot wrong all my life. But some things I get right. Like prioritising the Eurovision Song Contest over sleep and sustenance. And like always, it's totally worth it. Denmark put on an amazing show - the staging and lighting has to be the competition's best in history. So beautifully done.
False alarm guys, I am still technically an Always Single Lady because I'm pretty sure I can't have a boyfriend who already has a girlfriend. A couple of weeks ago, a lady contacted me on Facebook accusing me of taking her man out on a date. I've been on many online dates the past six months so I had to ask her who her boyfriend was. She told me his name and - oh darn, her boyfriend had been telling me he's my boyfriend for the past 6 weeks. Wow. Epic, huge online dating fail. I should be angry and outraged like my girlfriends but I'm more baffled and confused than anything. ...How did I even do that?