What happened immediately after Baby Pham was out of my womb is a bit of a blur as I write this four months later (I am posting this 7 months later, this year has been a blur). I will try and record what I can remember.

The midwives immediately placed Baby Pham on my chest once they checked he was alive and well. His little chin quivered and he cried. One of the midwives moved him to my right breast but he wouldn't latch. She started trying to express colostrum without asking my permission or telling me what she was doing and I yelped in pain when she pinched my boob. I didn't see it coming because I only had eyes for Baby Pham. I had moved him over to my left breast because Boyfriend Pham was on my left and I wanted Baby as near to him as possible. Thankfully, while she was just starting to try and express colostrum from my right boob, Baby Pham latched onto my left so she left me alone with Baby and Dad after only one pinch. This was the only misstep by the midwives in an otherwise great birthing experience.

I opted to get an injection to force the placenta out rather than wait for my hormones to manage it naturally. I'm grateful for the critical role my placenta performed in bringing bub to me, but I wasn't emotionally attached to it - nor did I want to eat it, or plant it or any of the other things people do with their placentas. Birthing the placenta was a really weird sensation after feeling such heavy pressure there from a solid baby moments earlier. The placenta was a flexible blob so it simply slipped out of me without the need to bear down. I asked to see my placenta out of curiosity. I'd heard of other mums whose placenta deteriorated towards the end of pregnancy. Mine was healthy and kinda looked like a red steak. Nature. How bizarre.

We stayed like this with Baby Pham for a while because we had to wait for a senior surgeon to come and have a look at my two second-degree tears. The one on my perineum the doctor stitched up but the other tear that ran millimetres from my urethra and clitoris needed someone more senior to look at.

Eventually, Boyfriend Pham cut the umbilical cord and watched Baby get checked and weighed, while the senior surgeon assessed my damage and decided I didn't need surgery so stitched me up on the spot. The midwives seemed proud that I hadn't taken any pain medication for birth and the doctors were impressed I breathed through the local anesthetic injections in sensitive areas of my genitals. I'm lucky I have a high pain tolerance, it would have made the unpleasant experience even worse.

Boyfriend Pham advocated for skin-on-skin time with Baby while I had a shower made a little awkward by my catheter (they weren't sure if I could pee or not with the tear so near my uretethra). I suppose this was a second misstep by the midwives that they didn't offer or suggest skin-on-skin time for the father while I was preoccupied.

Overall, we had a wonderful birth experience and the hospital team handled our hurdles and hiccups with care and confidence. Giving birth was the most intense experience of my life, and it was worth it to meet my little man on the other side.

Our fertility and pregnancy experience