Since I was turning the big 3-0 this year, I decided to give myself a whole month to celebrate. I went on a single ladies date on the actual day. Then once my eyeballs recovered from laser surgery, I went for a 5-day beach holiday with my childhood bestie and Little Sissy Pham to Noosa on the Sunshine Coast in Queensland. It was divine.
For nearly a decade I’ve been avoiding the gym the way my cat avoids visitors - with a stealthy yet panicked trot in the opposite direction. But faced with the option to become a complete slob or start working out, I chose to join a gym.
Even though I was on a dating spree and had a Valentine this year, I ditched my beau for a single ladies date night because it’s my birthday and I can do what I want to. Which turned out to be being good boyfriend to my girlfriends.
I’ve been carefully plotting my future as a single cat lady for about a decade (only seriously for the past two years) so this gorgeous Karen Walker cat ring (she happens to be my favourite sunglasses designer) was the perfect 30th gift from my beautiful friend Elise. Though, of course, now I’m in a relationship with one homo sapiens and not 13-18 domestic felines as I’d planned because life just never happens the way you expect it to.
So I left my dream job and my beloved CK Phamly. Surprise! It was a sad decision but sometimes you gotta do what you need, not what you want.
I have mostly fond memories of growing up in the now demolished council flats in Kensington, Melbourne. Except for two violent ball related memories. One was getting a painful leg and ass-whooping from Mum Pham and her feather duster for having a $2 black and blue soccer ball stolen from the playground while we climbed on rocks.
I always thought I'd buy a boyfriend on eBay one day but I ended up getting one for free off Tinder. Bargain! You have to trawl through a lot more crap on Tinder but it's amazing what people will do for free things. I never thought I'd end up getting serious with a devout Christian. And I definitely never thought I'd go to church with him to see how the other side lives. Especially not after waking at 2am for the World Cup. I was scared I'd fall asleep and embarrass him by snoring or farting.